I Need A Savior...

I've been thinking a lot about what holiness can mean in my life. I want to be open to those who hold me accountable. I want to not need the approval of others, but rely on the approval of my heavenly Father. I want to be available for Him to use me whenever and wherever He chooses. I want to be content in my daily life, and not desire more "things" or "status."

What I want more than any of that, though, is a love relationship like William P. Young wrote about in The Shack. I read that last year in about four hours and using half a box of tissues. As I look back on my reading of that book and try to dissect why it affected me so much, it becomes quite obvious to me. I crave the kind of relationship that Papa, Jesus and the Spirit demonstrate in their conversations with each other. Don't we all want someone to love on us like that? I literally sobbed as I read through that part, and I know now it was because that was the deepest longing of my heart - that love connection. As Mac starts experiencing that love, it starts to flow out of him to those around him - even those who don't necessarily deserve it.

I remember thinking that if I could feel that kind of love, everything would be okay. And you know what? I was right! I just didn't know how to get there at the time. But God began to develop that desire in my heart and through the circumstances of life, drew me to Him this past April. I gave it all to Him: everything and He gave it all back to me: everything! All of the love that I so desperately longed for is now filling me so much that it begins to seep out of my pores and flow into others around me.

Here is a song that I'm enjoying more and more as I listen to KLOVE:

Among The Thirsty - I'd Need A Savior
From the album Wonder

How many names can I use to explain the love of my Jesus,
the life that he gave and so many times will I praise you today.
I lift up my life 'cause you're always the same
And my offering to you I bring

Chorus:
Your name is Jesus. Your name is Jesus.
You're the Wonderful, Counselor, my Friend.
You're what I hold on to; I know that you brought me through
All the days of loss, to the cross you knew
I'd need a Savior.

How many songs can I sing to proclaim your wondrous love and beauty so great?
What would I say if you brought down the rain and everyday
I walk through the pain my heart would still say:

Chorus:

You're what I hold on to; I know that you brought me through
All the days of loss, to the cross you knew
I'd need a Savior.
I'd need a Savior
I need you, Savior

That's my reality. I need you, Savior. You are my Friend. I need you; you bring me through everything. You have a plan for my life, to bless me and prosper me. Thank you, Abba Father, for showing me Your love for me. I'm so thankful that I have made Your love the one TRUTH in my life. Amen.